Josh Ritter - Girl In the War

My Biggest Fear?
Disappearance. Yeah, I don't assume anyone would really understand this. Most answers are heights, spiders, death, etc. but I'm afraid of disappearance. Not like being kidnapped or anything, I'm so afraid of 'the last ____'. I'm afraid of people leaving. Maybe it's because I've had to deal with so many important people in my life passing away at an early age, but please don't confuse that with death. I'm just afraid you will be taken away from me, either by your own will or some other heartbreaking force. I don't want you to leave. I don't want to quit. I don't want change. I don't want the disappearance of your love, your smile, your touch, your warmth. I'm so afraid of everything being taken away. Maybe that's why I keep nearly everything. I need it close. Don't disappear on me.

My Thankful Leaf?
I have no idea. I hate having to even think about it because I just feel silly with every little thing that I am grateful for. I will tell you what I'm grateful for, you will listen, and you will love and appreciate what I am thankful for more than you did. You will acknowledge these things. But someone who doesn't know me, fully know me, will find out what I'm thankful for and not understand. They won't think about those little things. They will think it pretentious that some silly girl would even think of those things. I am thankful for the smell of wet leaves. I am thankful for the eternal sky. I am thankful for the letter that came in my mailbox. I am thankful for the canyon. I am thankful for brush strokes. I am thankful for the light of the moon peaking through the tree branches on a cold November evening. I am thankful for the wind.

My Favorite Day of the Week?
Tuesday. You died on a Tuesday. You asked for my hand on a Tuesday. You told people about me on a Tuesday. You came to me on a Tuesday, you will leave me on a Tuesday. I ran from you and then back to you on a Tuesday. You gave me a second chance on a Tuesday. It will always be Tuesday.

Best Memory?
You pushed me in a little red wagon. You slept in my lap through the mountains of Colorado. You talked to me on the phone all night as we hung our heads upside-down over the side of the bed. You sang to me in my car when you weren't even there. You brought me flowers at 4 A.M. You kept me warm. You told me I was the rose. You painted me a picture. You let me h0ld you while you cried in the corner of my bed. You showed me the stars. I showed you the sunrise. You waited for me. You love me. You made a basket for me. You cried with me as the reality of it all came crashing down. It is all of you.

God?
Sometimes. Sometimes I think I never did. Sometimes I think I never stopped. Sometimes, there's nothing else. The Bible is a story. The miracles are unbelievable. But something greater? Can anyone believe in something they cannot see, hear, touch, taste? It's like asking if you can believe in love, trust, peace, imagination. Of course I can. I believe in all that is beautiful.

I am truly a girl in the war. Pretend the dove from above is a dragon and your feet are on fire. Do it for me now.